Notes and Things in Kholi's Journal

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Notes and Things in Kholi's Journal

I know you folks will eventually be tired of me explaining that my ability to give you sound teaching on love and life is, at all times, directly related to what’s happening in my own life.

But what can I say? It’s true.

So, unfortunately, no matter how much I want to give you all a completely developed blog filled with total understanding and your very own “uh, uh, girl! You don’t have to take that!” piece of personal empowerment, I just can’t do that—at least not today.

But what I can do …

I can let you help me think some things through.

I want to share a few thoughts and phrases that have been haunting both my mind—and my journal—for the last two weeks.

I hope that’s cool with you.

I’m going to pretend like you said "yes."

Don’t expect any particular order to this … just be here with me. If you want more of something, leave a comment. Got questions, totally disagree? Please, do tell!

Let what you want guide who you want.

Sometimes we wrap our hearts and desires around a particular person or type of person. We often identify this “who” without taking the time to establish a real understanding of “what” we want. This is stupid.

This is stupid because:

Who you want may not be capable of giving you what you want.

Who you want may not be capable of giving anyone what you want (don't take it personally).

If you never understand what it is you really want—what actions and what kinds of loving actually make you feel loved—you may find yourself in continuously unfulfilling relationships, usually with people you resent or who resent you.

Are you in a relationship with someone who just “doesn’t do it for you?” Perhaps you love them, maybe they love you too. But you consistently find yourself compromising your own needs and happiness in order to salvage the relationship or avoid an argument? Are you just not that into them? Cut it out.

Identify yourself and your light and your energy as your main sources of happiness. Great, now you’re happy.

When you’re good with you, only then, can you successfully find a partner that complements (not completes) you and your journey.

Quit resisting.

If it is for you it is for you. This is the most important