Hell hath no fury like a pint-sized singing sensation whose gays have been scorned! Dude. Kristin Chenoweth is PISSED OFF! Why, you ask?
Hell hath no fury like a pint-sized singing sensation whose gays have been scorned! Dude. Kristin Chenoweth is PISSED OFF! Why, you ask? Because Newsweek printed an astoundingly douchey article purporting that gay and lesbian actors are “never” convincing when they “play straight.” Especially after those sneaky sidewinders come out of the closet, doggone-it!
Poor Ramin Setoodeh. Apparently, once he knows a performer to be an enthusiast of the love that dare not speak its fierceness (which he may or may not partake of himself), he just can’t wrap his head around the idea of such a person batting for the other team, even for pretendsies! Witness his impressive powers of de-douche-cton firsthand in this excerpt taken directly from his article, entitled “Straight Jacket”. (FYI, he’s talking about Sean Hayes, best known as Jack from Will and Grace and currently starring on Broadway opposite our girl Chenoweth in the revival of Promises, Promises.)
Setoodeh writes: “Hayes is among Hollywood’s best verbal slapstickers, but his sexual orientation is part of who he is, and also part of his charm. (The fact that he only came out of the closet just before Promises was another one of those Ricky Martin-duh moments.) But frankly, it’s weird seeing Hayes play straight. He comes off as wooden and insincere, like he’s trying to hide something, which of course he is. Even the play’s most hilarious scene, when Chuck tries to pick up a drunk woman at a bar, devolves into unintentional camp. Is it funny because of all the ’60s-era one-liners, or because the woman is so drunk (and clueless) that she agrees to go home with a guy we all know is gay?”
Sean Hayes, International Man of International Male
There’s so much I could say about the rampant asshattery and obtuseness of this dude’s argument, but I’ve had two margaritas tonight and I think KriChen has it covered spectacularly, so I’mma let her say it instead. Here is her written response to Setoodeh’s article in its entirety, as run over at BroadwayWorld.com:
“As a longtime fan of Newsweek and as the actress currently starring opposite the incredibly talented (and sexy!) Sean Hayes in the Broadway revival of ‘Promises, Promises,’ I was shocked on many levels to see Newsweek publishing Ramin Setoodeh’s horrendously homophobic ‘Straight Jacket,’ which argues that gay actors are simply unfit to play straight. From where I stand, on stage, with Hayes, every night — I’ve observed nothing ‘wooden’ or ‘weird’ in his performance, nor have I noticed the seemingly unwieldy presence of a ‘pink elephant’ in the Broadway Theater. (The Drama League, Outer Critics Circle and Tony members must have also missed that large animal when nominating Hayes’ performance for its highest honors this year.)
I’d normally keep silent on such matters and write such small-minded viewpoints off as perhaps a blip in common sense. But the offense I take to this article, and your decision to publish it, is not really even related to my profession or my work with Hayes or Jonathan Groff (also singled out in the article as too ‘queeny’ to play ‘straight.’) This article offends me because I am a human being, a woman and a Christian. For example, there was a time when Jewish actors had to change their names because anti-Semites thought no Jew could convincingly play Gentile. Setoodeh even goes so far as to justify his knee-jerk homophobic reaction to gay actors by accepting and endorsing that ‘as viewers, we are molded by a society obsessed with dissecting sexuality, starting with the locker room torture in junior high school.’ Really? We want to maintain and proliferate the same kind of bullying that makes children cry and in some recent cases have even taken their own lives?
That’s so sad, Newsweek! The examples he provides (what scientists call “selection bias”) to prove his ‘gays can’t play straight’ hypothesis are sloppy in my opinion. Come on now! Openly gay Groff is too ‘queeny’ to play Lea Michelle’s boyfriend in GLEE, but is a ‘heartthrob’ when he does it in Spring Awakening? Cynthia Nixon only ‘got away with it’ ’cause she peaked before coming out? I don’t know if you’ve missed the giant Sex and the City movie posters, but it seems most of America is ‘buying it.’ I could go on, but I assume these will be taken care of in your ‘Corrections’ this week.
Don’t you go throwing shade on her gays! KriChen
will bake you in a mofo-ing pie and EAT YOU.
Similarly, thousands of people have traveled from all over the world to enjoy Hayes’ performance and don’t seem to have one single issue with his sexuality! They have no problem buying him as a love-torn heterosexual man. Audiences aren’t giving a darn about who a person is sleeping with or his personal life. Give me a break! We’re actors first, whether we’re playing prostitutes, baseball players, or the Lion King. Audiences come to theater to go on a journey. It’s a character and it’s called acting, and I’d put Hayes and his brilliance up there with some of the greatest actors period.
Lastly, as someone who’s been proudly advocating for equal rights and supporting GLBT causes for as long as I can remember, I know how much it means to young people struggling with their sexuality to see out & proud actors like Sean Hayes, Jonathan Groff, Neil Patrick Harris and Cynthia Nixon succeeding in their work without having to keep their sexuality a secret. No one needs to see a bigoted, factually inaccurate article that tells people who deviate from heterosexual norms that they can’t be open about who they are and still achieve their dreams. I am told on good authority that Mr. Setoodeh is a gay man himself and I would hope, as the author of this article, he would at least understand that. I encourage Newsweek to embrace stories which promote acceptance, love, unity and singing and dancing for all!
– Kristin Chenoweth”
Sing it, sister!